ddd

We have an pretty great annual tradition in this family but it is just for 2 members. And it was started by the youngest member a few years ago which makes it so cute. And it makes me smile when I think about it. Daddy-Daughter Day! The next one is planned for this Saturday so there has been A LOT of talking and planning for it by Emelie for the last few weeks. SOME things on the agenda are putt-putt golf, the driving range, a visit to the pet store to play with some kitties, popcorn and a movie (or DVD) and some snuggling, Maggie Moos Ice Cream, Target, Staples, Best Buy or Wal-Mart for a little gadget shopping, Coffee Cup Diner for brunch, boardgames and cardgames, maybe some Harry Potter legos, and about a dozen other items to squeeze in to what I'm sure will be a jam-packed fun filled very memorable day.

I LOVE how much Emelie LOVES DDD. I think I love how much she loves PLANNING them even more. And it is pretty cute to watch and listen to too.

I am pretty sure her daddy loves them too.

so much

When you drop your first child off at college, there are an endless number of things you could blog about - the chaos of moving day; the stereotypical tumultuous summer prior to; the roller coaster of emotions of emptiness and loss to excitement and pride, of all parties involved I might add. The list goes on and on. It is hard for me to choose and I certainly don't want to write about all of it - too emotionally drained to even THINK about doing that.

What I think I do want to remember is the feeling of relief as I reflect on all of it, mostly because it is so unexpected. I thought I would be crying like a baby overwhlemed with my own sense of loss when I hugged and kissed her and said goodbye to those beautiful blue eyes til who knows when. Instead, I watched her scurry out of the drizzly weather and off to her new life last night without looking back even once. We got out of the rain too and headed home after three days of parent orientation/information sessions and a ridiculous number of trips to her new 11x13 abode. And I didn't cry at all. I just wanted to recap all of the great things that we had the privelege and honor to observe first hand: her roommate and she seemed to be getting along great, she was getting to know others in the hall and her orientation group, she was taking charge and managing her crazy schedule and had already taken part of a few freshman traditions. And I smiled.

And then I was reminded of a similar milestone that happened exactly 15 autumns ago when I dropped her off at preschool in a new building with complete strangers where she new nobody, and I mean nobody. She kissed me and smiled and never looked back even once. And that feeling of relief , also unexpected all those years ago, enveloped me like a warm and comfy blanket then too.

She's gonna be fine. Better than fine. And we will be too.

the last supper

Steak, baked potatoes and corn on the cob. An excellent meal by any standards.No messiah, no apostles and no crab though. I asked her what she wanted to eat her last night at home and of course she wanted seafood (I think she loves it more than me) and I could not comply. To be specific, she wanted crab newberg made from the McCormack seasoning packs you used to be able to buy in the store. Keywords: used to. They haven't made it for a few years now and we can't seem to find a comparable recipe either and believe me we have tried. So for her last meal before she headed off to college, we substitued the good ol' midwestern meal. She was satisfied and grateful but I couldn't help but think how this was just the beginning of me not being able to "be there" for her when she needed me, even though she would probably not admit that she needs anyone for anything anyway - what 18 year old does? I know she is only 45 miles away and of course there is texting, facebooking, skype and the old standby, email but it just won't be the same and that's got me feeling, well... sad. The good news is that she isn't sad at all and is really ready for this "beg-ending" to begin and that makes me... happy. I love you Jessica and wish you the best at DU!

And somethin' tells me the messiah was there after all.